There’s a tree in the corner all covered in stuff,
With tinsel and shed loads of lights,
And placed round the tree, with a strange symmetry,
Those presents that please and delight.
They all really know how to entertain,
They really are the hosts with the most.
There’s bound to be ham and who knows, chilli jam,
And we might give the Queen the odd toast.
I know there’ll be smoked mackerel pate,
Because that’s always a palpable hit.
Enough will be made to feed a brigade,
And more, if supplies will permit.
And what of the Christmas Turkey?
This bird died in a very good cause,
It has every trimming, and none of it slimming,
And should be consumed with aplomb and applause!
After eating that beast, in this marvellous feast,
And the hours simply flying on by,
Without more ado, we’ll down a champagne or two,
And spread brandy butter upon that mince pie.